Jordan David Adam

We had three biological children when we were first married.  At 24 we were told we could not have anymore children.  Initially, we accepted the news and considered ourselves blessed for the children we did have. Reflecting back,  I think just being so young with three kids under five I really couldn't see into the future very far. After settling down and building our house we started really feeling the longing for another child.  At first, it was a mild tugging and then it became a very loud sound in both of our hearts.  We had both come from families of four and always saw ourselves with a large family.  Adam actually wanted six kids.  :)  In 2004 Adam and I started talking about adoption.  Adam's dad was adopted along with one of our closest friends so to us it was not a totally new concept.  However, it was uncharted waters for us.   None of our friends or family had ever done it.  We decided to go to an informational meeting at our local DHS in Maine; only one person even knew it was on our hearts.  We set through the meeting and I  feverishly took down all the information I could.   Soon after, the African Children's Choir came to our church and something happened to me in that service after looking into those beautiful brown eyes.   It was like a light went on that there are so many children that need homes and that I should not let fear hold me back. I began to research the process and could not believe how vast the need really was.  Statistic after statistic kept piercing my heart.  Then we couldn't walk away as overwhelming as the process seemed... and it did!  In 2004 we started the Home Study Process in our state to find a child in the foster care system. We put our age range from 2-6 years old.  We were matched twice but neither case turned into a placement.   After waiting for two years with no placement we decided to take some control back and look outside our area. In December of 2006 a friend of mine gave me a list of agencies looking to place newborns;  that same week I called and spoke to the Director realizing there was a need we forwarded all the paperwork.  We then settled in for a long wait especially since now we would most likely end up with an infant.    Four weeks later in January of 2007 we received a call on a Saturday morning just as we were headed out to Portland to do some shopping. It was the Director I had spoken to previously.  She told me that there had been a baby boy born the night before and asked if she could take our profile book to the hospital to meet the birth mother.  Within an hour she called back and said we were chosen by the birth mom.  My hearts instantly knew he was ours!   The agency director asked how soon could we come. It was a lot to take in in such a short amount of time.  We made phone calls and packed up for the 900 miles trip from Maine to Ohio.  I think this being our first adoption shielded us from even a lot of the normal fears that you would think one would have. Naively, we really just expected everything to work out.  We packed and started to drive.  It really wasn't until we had been in the car for a few hours that it really hit me.  Plus, every new phone call had more questions that I couldn't answer.   I  was told he was tiny but he was healthy...that was it.  So, me being the personality type I am I called the hospital to check on my newborn son (I have since learned this is frowned upon but ignorance is bliss).  It was so good to talk to the nurse and she was able to tell me how he was feeding and sleeping.  At one point, I heard him crying in the background.  Now I couldn't get there fast enough.  We drove through the night in rain and fog.  We talked and dreamed the whole way there.  After a quick check in at the hotel we showered and dressed to go meet our new son.  No sleeping for us!  It was an hour drive to the hospital from the hotel.  The closer we got the more my heart started to pound.  We went to the maternity ward and showed all of our ID and they put us in a room to wait.  Nearly an hour passed and by now we are going crazy waiting.  The door opened and it was the pediatrician; she wanted to talk to us first.  She shared with us that he was pretty scrawny with no fat on his little frame.  My biological babies were all good size so all I knew was plump, chubby, pink babies.  She also told us that they had some medical concerns about his health.  Okay, now my heart and mind was racing.  My husband knew I was a bit overwhelmed by the events of the last few days so he just calmly assured me that our journey had been covered in prayer and that God had chosen the perfect baby for us.  They brought him in and I nervously unwrapped him.  The concept that he was really mine had not quite set in.  He was tiny and lanky and  he was covered in broken blood vessels.  He had this crazy fly away head of brown hair.  It was a bit awkward for me sharing such a private bonding moment with so many onlookers.  The nurse we had the first night was a Godsend.  She said let's leave you alone for a bit and she told me to take him out and feed him.  She left and Adam followed to go get us some food.  There we were all alone.  I held him to my chest and nuzzled him.   I prayed and asked God to bring peace into our hospital room and  I asked God to heal anything that might be going on inside my newborn son.  By the time Adam came back the room was filled with peace and quiet and all my maternal instincts for this tiny life came flooding in.  The nurse came back and said his blood results looked great.  They let us stay in a room together just like if you had delivered so all night we cuddled and bonded.  I remember smelling him and stroking his fine, wispy hair.  He fit perfect right in the crook of my neck.  I fell so in love with him and all my fears were gone.  I knew he was ours and no matter what the future would bring we would face it together as a family. I now believed he was mine down in my heart.  The rest of the days we hung out to fill out all the paperwork to go back to Maine. In Ohio the birth mom has 3 days to change her mind.  It is a long three days!  You are bonding and falling deeply in love but you are waiting to be told that this child is yours forever.  It silly really because your heart already does that; your heart is unaware it needs permission to love.   It was a special time with just the three of us.  However, I could not wait to get back to Maine to share him with his new siblings and all of our extended family.  We were back in Maine for my birthday and it was the best birthday I have ever had!  We named him as a family.  Jordan, because I always loved that name and I felt it has an irony there....how the Israelites had to cross the river Jordan before they could reach the promised land.   Our journey had been so long and with so many twists and turns I felt like it deserved recognition.  David, because my prayer was to impart my heart for worship into him just like the psalmist David.   Adam, because Kaleb felt he had to have the same middle name as he and his father.  So there it was, Jordan David Adam, a big name for such a tiny guy.  Well, let's just say if you know Jordan he needed a big name!  He has a big personality!  He picks up on the little details of life...the things the rest of us so often miss.  He tells me when the moon is full, he notices stars and flowers.  He walks into every room like he owns it.  He is stunning with big brown eyes, gorgeous curls and a smile that can make any heart melt.  He was the fulfillment of a dream.  He was so worth the wait and the paperwork and the financial strain.  People say all the time he is so lucky... I say NO, we are so lucky!  So lucky God choose us to be his parents.  Jordan David Adam January 12, 2007  <3