Waiting

 "But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."  Isaiah 40:31
 
The old song use to say...."Teach me Lord; Teach me Lord to wait".  I think the writer was simply saying....you are going to have to teach me because waiting does not come natural and I do not know how to do it!

If you know me you know I hate to wait.  I mean hate it.  I don't want to wait for anything!  I don't want to wait in a line or wait for a surprise.  I don't want to wait to give a present or wait for a test result.  Some of it is my personality, some human nature and some of it stems from being such a busy woman that waiting really feel like a complete waste of my precious time!  So, when we started the adoption process I got the biggest lesson in waiting I had ever had!! 

The adoption process is just that, once your paperwork is done you just wait. Wait!  You have to be mentally, physically, and emotionally prepared to bring a child into your family at any moment but then wait.  You have these dreams...these promises..... and yet you are forced to sit back and...wait.  When you are biologically carrying a child you get an estimated due date....a light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak.  However, when you are "heart pregnant" with an adopted baby you have no due date....you must be ready for tomorrow but it could be weeks or month or even years.  This was the hardest part for me and for most of the adoptive parents I have talked with.  You feel so out of control.  So vulnerable.  Your heart is ready and aching.  It is a painful place to be and yet we can learn so much during this time.  

I learned so much about God's timing versus mine.  How He really is not at all concerned or confined by our "human time".  Most important I learned to Trust.  To Trust His promises not based on my circumstances!  See while waiting we question.  If you read my prior post called Jeremiah you can really see this here.  I had a promise, I had a dream but time was falling through my hands like grains of sand and the more time that passed the heavier my heart became.  To the point, I began to question if I had even heard God right in the first place!  Now that our family is complete it may seem silly that I felt this way.... that I found it hard to believe.  I am a flawed human and so to be honest I became so weary in the waiting I questioned everything.


The other thing I learned about waiting is...it can be so lonely!!  It feels as if others around you are going on with their lives and you are almost "stuck in time".  You can't move forward or backward.  You are just "treading water".  This is where Trust and Faith comes in.  This is where you can learn a deeper level of relationship with Jesus than you have ever known.  To be put in a position where you learn that no matter how sad or lonely or hopeless I feel.... I choose to believe what He told me.  I choose to believe what He placed in my heart.  I know He is holding my hand on this journey so no matter how long it takes...I will not let go of His hand and I will keep walking!  I don't care how tired I become or how tough the terrain is I will keep walking!


If you are reading this and you are waiting I know this will be hard to hear but waiting can  be a gift!  A gift from God to us.  He can build our character and deepen our intimacy with Him.  Through waiting He prepares us for the very greatness he has called us to walk into.  This lesson of waiting can be used over and over in our lives and the lives of those around us.  Waiting for wayward children to come back, broken marriages, healing, financial security, direction in ministry, and the list goes on and on.  Life is a journey and the best things in life are so often only brought about after a "waiting period".  Roman 5:3-11 tells us..."And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us."


So, whether you are a waiting adoptive parent or you are brought into this place of waiting for another reason.  Allow your Heavenly Father to comfort you today and know that you will not stay in this place of waiting forever.  This is a temporary season to bring you to what God ultimately has for you.  Let your Faith be increased, find Peace, find Joy, find hope in your waiting!


"I am worn out waiting for your rescue, but I have put my hope in your word." Psalm 119:81


^"He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength."  Isaiah 40:29